Duality in all of us.

I was listening to a 2Pac album this week, When i realized how contradictory he was.
how can the same man who wrote "HIT EM UP" (lyrics to the right) be the same guy to say ...
"I'm going to make a change. And my change is going to make a change through the community. And through that, they gonna see what type of person I truly was. Where my heart was. This Thug Life stuff, it was just ignorance. My intentions was always in the right place. I never killed anybody, I never raped anybody, I never committed no crimes that weren't honorable-that weren't to defend myself. So that's what I'm going to show them. I'm going to show people my true intentions, and my true heart. I'm going to show them the man that my mother raised. I'm going to make them all proud."

I can't tell you how many conversations I have as a Younglife Leader in the last four years where a kid spills out his heart about an issue and how he wants and needs to change his life only to fall back into the same patterns. It's almost as if the person I talked to was someone completely different than the stories I hear about them. So it goes from a far off concept with 2pac and comes close to home with a Younglife kid and finally hits home when I myself am not able to be a single minded person, I desire things that I know would tear my life apart. I work with all my being to be one person. Something inside of me wants so desperately to do the opposite of what I know is good for me. I have been a Believer for 8 years now, and still i struggle with these things but one comfort I have is that even in Christianity this Duality seems to plague the "Biblical Heroes"
Noah made an arc, but also got naked and pasted out drunk in a field,
Moses parted the red sea, but also Murdered an Egyptian,
David a man after Gods heart also Slept with another mans wife got her pregnant
Paul wrote large portion of the new testament, Persecuted and Killed Christians.

Cherokee Proverbs capture our Duality like this:
Two Wolves

An old Cherokee told his grandson that a battle that goes on inside each us.
The battle is between two 'wolves'.
One 'wolf' is Evil. It has anger, envy, jealousy, sorrow, regret, greed, arrogance, self-pity, guilt, resentment, inferiority, lies, false pride, superiority, and ego.
The other 'wolf' is Good. It has joy, peace, love, hope, serenity, humility, kindness, benevolence, empathy, generosity, truth, compassion and faith."

The grandson thought about it for a minute and then asked his grandfather: "Which wolf wins?"

The old Cherokee simply replied, "The one you feed."

...fin